Conversations with Dustfinger
by radha24-Dusty's apprentice
Summary: As the title says, this is a series of conversations I have with Dustfinger. They will answer most of the questions EVERYONE wants to know about Dustfinger.  Also, this is my first fanfic, so please, R&R! UPDATED!
1. What was it like being dead?

**A/N: This is my first fanfic, so please, review it so that I know what I can improve. Also, if there's a question you want me to ask Dustfinger, please tell me!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dustfinger (I wish I did!) or Silvertounge aka the Bluejay. However, I **_**do **_**own myself (hopefully!).**

Today's question is: What was it like being dead?

Day One:

Okay, I am (stupidly) going to ask Dustfinger what it was like being dead. Pray for me, please!

Me: Hey Dustfinger, I had a quick question.

Dusty: Okay.

Me (casually): Um….what was it like being dead?

Dusty: WHAT?

Me: I _said_ what was-

Dusty: I _know_ what you said, I was just wondering if I had heard you right.

Me: Okay, so what was it like?

Dusty: Are you _seriously_ asking me that?

Me: Yes.

Dusty: You're _really_ that _stupid_?

Me: Apparently.

Dusty (frustrated): Why would you _ask_ someone that?

Me: Because I want to know the answer.

Dusty: Stop doing that!

Me: Doing what?

Dusty: Being sassy with me.

Me: I AM NOT!

Dusty: Yes, you are, like it or not.

Me: So, I ask you again, what was it like dead?

Dusty (looks at the sky): Some people never learn, do they?

Me: Is that supposed to be an answer?

Dusty: NO. Ahhhh, so you REALLY want to know what it was like for me when I was dead?

Me: Yes.

Dusty: You have the _audacity_ to ask me that question?

Me: Apparently, yes.

Dusty: YOU KNOW WHAT, if you don't stop doing that I will never answer your question.

Me: What. Am. I. Doing?

Dusty: Giving me all these cheeky answers like "yes" "no" or "apparently"

Me: That is _not _being cheeky. I'm just giving you straight answers to your questions.

Dusty: Well, why don't you _always_ do that then?

Me: Because it _boring_ giving straight answers the whole time.

Dusty: See? You're probably just doing it to annoy me, aren't you?

Me (looks at her feet): Um….No…Why would I want to annoy you, the Great Fire-Dancer?

Dusty: Really Radha? _Really_? You really think I'm going to buy that. I wasn't born yesterday, you know.

Me: I _know_ you weren't born yesterday, and I _didn't_ really expect you to buy it.

Dusty: Well then, out with the truth!

Me: Okay, okay, I _was_ trying to be a bit annoying. But-

Dusty: As if your _question_ wasn't annoying enough.

Me: Yeah, so can you please stop _stalling_? Just answer the question!

Dusty: Stalling? And Me? I'm _not_ stalling. I was simply making sure you knew what you were getting into. I was trying to give you a second chance.

Me: No, I'm perfectly serious.

Dusty: Well then, don't say I didn't warn you, when you're being roasted.

Me: What?

Dusty: The second part of that is purely fictional Radha (thinks "or not!).

Me: Okay.

Dusty: Being dead was just….feeling empty, playing with fire for the White Women, and just being still. There, I answered your question. _Happy now_?

Me: You call THAT an answer? That was _nothing_, I tell you, NOTHING!

Dusty (brimming with suppressed anger): You know, I think you should be quiet now.

Me: And WHY SHOULD I?

Dusty (in a warning tone, with gritted teeth): Because If you don't, there might be a violent occurrence involving you and fire.

Me: Oh, now you're threatening me, are you? Just like Basta threatened little girls. You scolded him then, but you're no better than he is.

Dusty (sparks are flying): How _dare_ you compare me to _Basta_? YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS!

Me: I'm not scared of you! Why? Because I know, you would never kill anyone in the first place! It's something I admire about you, but you're really starting to get on my bad side now, Dustfinger.

Dusty: YOU THINK I CARE WHETHER I'M ON YOUR BAD SIDE OR NOT? Really, I'm warning you. Stop talking now if you know what's good for you.

Me (really scared now, but acting brave): I'm _not_ going to stop talking. If it ends up being brown belt against fire-eater, let that happen.

Dusty (really, really angry): WELL NOW YOU ASKED FOR IT! (Starts whispering fire-words to throw at me but stops when someone barges open the door)

The someone: Dustfinger, what are you _doing_?

Dusty: SILVERTOUNGE, DON'T EVEN TRY TO CALM ME DOWN! THIS GIRL ASKED FOR IT!

Silvertounge (looks at me, and then at Dustfinger, then speaks gently): Child, what did you do that made him so angry?

Me (awestruck): Are-are you the-the-the Bluejay?

Silvertounge: Yes, I am, though it's been a long time since I used that name. So, what did you do?

Me (sheepishly): I…..uh….I…..uh-

Dusty (still angry): SHE ASKED ME WHAT IT WAS LIKE BEING DEAD!

Silvertounge (understands the situation): Child,- wait, what's your name?

Dusty: Her thrice-accursed name is Radha!

Me: Who are you calling thrice accursed? You-

Silvertounge (interrupting): Though I don't know if Dustfinger dealt with it the right way—

Dusty: SILVERTOUNGE! LET ME HANDLE THIS!

Silvertounge:—you, Radha, shouldn't have acted like that.

Me: Ok, Bluejay. But how did you know something was wrong in the first place?

Silvertounge: First, because we have a special internal bond. Second, because the sounds of the two of you could be heard a mile away. Third-

Dusty: BLUEJAY, LEAVE ME ALONE! JUST LEAVE! I CAN HANDLE THIS.

Silvertounge: I'll leave…..if you promise not to kill or harm this girl in any way.

Dusty (grudgingly): Fine, fine, I will. I promise. (after the Bluejay leaves) You were lucky this time, Radha. Don't do that EVER AGAIN!

Me: I'm really, really sorry. I promise I will never do that again in my life. Word of Honor!

Dusty and Me: sigh, well at least that's over. See you guys tomorrow!


	2. Where is Dustfinger's pool?

Today's question is: Where is Dustfinger's pool?

Day Two:

Me: Hey Dustfinger, do you know where the pool where you met the water nymphs is in the Inkworld?

Dusty: Yeah, it's on the outside of the Wayless Woods.

Me (sarcastically): Yeah, that helps a _lot_. Cornelia _didn't_ mention that in the book.

Dusty: Wait, who's Cornelia?

Me: The person who wrote Inkheart, Inkspell, and Inkdeath, among many other books.

Dusty (confused); But I thought Fenoglio-curse him!- wrote Inkheart.

Me: Ok, this is actually kind of complicated. Fenoglio wrote the original book, Inkheart. Then Cornelia Funke wrote a book about the original Inkheart, and the adventures associated with it, from the time you coughbetrayedcough the Foltcharts, to the death of the Adderhead.

Dusty: So you're telling me that I'm part of TWO stories?

Me: Yes.

Dusty: Heavens above! Why do all these people keep on messing with my life? Why can't they just LEAVE ME ALONE, with MY life, and let me live it the way I want to? These authors just have to MESS with EVERYTHING!

Me: Dustfinger, don't say that. In my opinion, the authors just report a tiny bit of the real story of the worlds they "create". Besides, if Cornelia hadn't written that, how would I have ever found out about you?

Dusty: You do have a point but still, sometimes I wish they would just mind their own business. You know, live, and let live.

Me: So, let's get back on track. (pulls out Inkheart and shows map) Do you know where your pool is on this map?

Dusty: I'm not really that good with maps. Besides, it would be really hard to explain to someone who's never seen my world.

Me (visibly disappointed): Oh, okay…...I'll just ask someone else.

Dusty (trying to cheer me up): What if I show you a new fire trick!

Me (excited): Okay, let's go outside! Can I try too?

Dusty: Yeah, sure! Let's go outside!


	3. How does Dustfinger feel about writers?

Today's question is: How does Dustfinger feel about writers?

Day Three:

Me (sadly): Look, I only have two reviews. TWO!

Dusty: It's okay, we can get through this together. (walks over to me )

Me: Yeah, but what's the fun of writing if no one is reading.

Dusty: You're a writer?

Me: Of course, it's really fun!

Dusty: But then….that means you're one of those meddlers, too.

Me (indignantly): I am _NOT _a meddler!

Dusty: Well that means you're no better than them!

Me (truly hurt): How could you say that to me! You were talking about "we'll get through this together" and now you're accusing me of something I DIDN'T EVEN DO!

Dusty: Actually you are doing it.

Me: I write stories because I love writing them and I love hearing other people say they like them. Authors aren't bad people.

Dusty: That's easy for _you_ to say. _You _haven't had them mess around with your life!

Me (hurt): Please Dustfinger, don't talk to me like that. It's really hurting my feelings.

Dusty: It's hurting _your_ feelings, is it? Well you know what, those cursed writers hurt my WHOLE LIFE!

Me: Listen, I know the horrible things a certain person, coughFenogliocough, wrote about, but aren't we all glad it never happened? That's something from the past, and even if you wanted to from the depths of your heart, you can't change it now.

Dusty: Well I won't ever forget it! I just can't!

Me: Yes, but through the years of my life, I've learned one thing about it. That is "anything that doesn't kill you makes you stronger"

Dusty(looks at his arms mockingly); I don't have any more muscles.

Me; Dustfinger, you _know_ what I'm saying. it makes you _know_ stronger.

Dusty: I guess, but it doesn't make life any easier.

Me: No, it doesn't.

….

**Wow, that was slightly depressing. Hope I haven't sent anyone away!**


	4. Does Dustfinger think he's bad?

Me: Dustfinger, what would you say if you heard that someone thinks you aren't a good person.

Dusty: First, tell me if you are sane now.

ME: Of COURSE, I'm SANE!

Dusty: Okay, that's good 'cause you weren't sane yesterday. Or the day before that, for that matter.

Me: Who're you calling insane?

Dusty: I'm calling YOU insane.

Me: But-

Dusty (cuts me off, tries to be annoying): To answer your question….hmmmm…..wait…What was it again?

Me (sarcastically): I asked you what you would say if someone said you weren't a good person.

Dusty (sarcastically): Forgive me for answering a question with a question, but what would _you_ feel if you were seen as a bad guy in a story.

Me: I would not like it. Well, it might be fun…

Dusty: Fun? I'll give you fun. You're just a meddler meddling with people's lives. You write stories that convict people to different fates. You probably _love_ your villains.

Me: dustfinger.-

Dusty (0n a roll): Fun? Well I'll show you fun. Throwing knives and killing people, I bet you think that's fun. Killing off all of your characters, well that must be _fun_ too.

Me: Dustfinger!-

Dusty(still on a roll): "Oh look, I just killed off someone's husband!" " I don't care because it makes the story more _interesting_." You know, those people do have _lives_ in those stories you write. You might write a stroy for _fun_, but you don't even care about the characters you've created. You-

Me: DUSTFINGER!

Dusty: WHAT?

Me: Ok, I'm sorry I said it was fun. I won't say that again. But can we _please_ move on?

Dusty: Oh, you want me to _move on _ now, do you? You just want to get off listening to the _truth_.

Me: Can you at least answer my question?

Dusty: No. Not. Until. I'm. Done.

Me: But-

Dusty: No. I don't know how you could ask a question like that in the first place!

Me: I didn't ask it. Someone else did., so I just wanted to see what _you_ thought about it.

Dusty: Well, unlike _some_ people, most don't like being called any type of bad guy. I'd think you'd know that, since you got all A's this quarter and semester. That should mean that you're a _tiny_ bit smart.

Me: I am smart, but that is besides the point. I ask you, WHAT DO MY GRADES HAVE TO DO WITH THE QUESTION?

Dusty: Because smart people should be able to make inferences as to whether people would like or dislike being called _bad_!

Me: I'm sorry, but can you just explain? That way this…...friend….of mine will know what you think about it.

Dusty (a little calmed down): Well, I think I am a good person, it's just that in the old days in _your_ world, I just let my longing for my own world take over me. I was too soft-hearted and believed whatever Capricorn was saying, even though I should have _known_ he was lying. And there was something else…...but I don't want to talk about it.

_Dusty (thinking): That thing was my fear. My dark fear that made me helpless. Now I've overcome that, so I shouldn't let it bother me anymore._

Me(senses that it's not wise to push anymore): Oh, ok. I'm sorry if I upset you.

Dusty (looks at me): No…it's okay. I…I shouldn't have said some of those things, either.

Me: Yeah, they were pretty hurtful…...but its okay.

Dusty: So what do you want to do now?

Me : Play with fire!

Dust y(tries to lighten up the mood): Yeah sure, you know, you're starting to do pretty well on throwing those torches.

Me: Why, thank you!

Dusty: You're very welcome!

Both head outside. Last scene you see is them laughing together while Radha is throwing torches high into the sky…...but having some difficulty catching them! :D

…...

**Me (thinking): Wait, that was weird, how did I know what Dustfinger was thinking. Hmm… I hope I'm not a psychic! XDDDD**


	5. Dustfinger & rain

**A/N :****Sorry guys, the reason I haven't been conversing with Dustfinger lately is that he went off to God-knows-where for like a week and now he's "taking a break" (which basically means he's doing nothing but staring at the trees and absent-mindedly striking matches) so he isn't very talkative at the moment. Not that he EVER was talkative, but now it's even less than usual. **

…

Oh wow, It's raining cats and dogs outside, I should probably call Dustfinger in.

Me: Dustfinger!

Dusty: What?

Me: Look, I know you still want to take a break, but its _raining_ outside. You'll catch your death if you stay out there.

Dusty: Fine, I'll come in. but don't interview me, ok? I am still on my break.

Me (sarcastically): Yeah, your BREAK.

Dusty (comes in):I have good reason for talking a break You're right though, it _is_ pretty wet out there.

Me: Yeah, as annoying as you're being at the moment, I _don't_ want you to die.

Dusty: I'm not being annoying.

Me: Oh sure, you're not.

Dusty: Stop talking like that.

Me: The only people I have to listen to is my parents.

Dusty: Yeah, but for now, since your parents are out, you have to listen to me.

Me: Oh fine. But I don't think you need to take a week long break. It's not like you _do_ much anyways.

Dusty: Yes, I do! Wait, why am I wasting time arguing with this teenager.

Me: What—exactly—is this important thing that you do?

Dusty: I don't have to explain myself to a thirteen year old.

Me: True. But-

Dusty: Listen, I think it's just this bad weather that's getting to us. Let's not have a big arguing.

Me (grudgingly): You're probably right…

_Me (thinks): You don't know what my next plan is, though. As soon as the rain stops…beware, Dustfinger. Though I'm the one who should be wary, since if I make __Dustfinger angry… Still, it'll be fun to watch…._

Dusty: Right, so now I'll just go do my thing, ok. I'm in the family room if you need me.

Me: Sure, bye.

…

**Mwahahahahaha! Poor, poor Dusty! You don't know what I'm planning! **

**R&R people. Does anyone have a better idea for the chapter name? If so, please tell me.**


	6. Thoughts before The Plan

**A/N :****Sorry guys, the reason I haven't been conversing with Dustfinger lately is that he went off to God-knows-where for like a week and now he's "taking a break" (which basically means he's doing nothing but staring at the trees and absent-mindedly striking matches) so he isn't very talkative at the moment. Not that he EVER was talkative, but now it's even less than usual. I have come up with a plan to get him talking again, and this is my mental conversation. Enjoy!**

**Mwahahahahaha! Poor, poor Dusty! You don't know what I'm planning! **

**...**

**Logical Me**: Don't do it!

_**Mischievous Me**__: Don't do what?_

LM: The thing you're planning to do!

_MM: What are you talking about?_

LM: You _know _what I'm talking about!

_MM__**:**__ No, I don't._

LM: Well then, don't do what you're planning to do to Dustfinger!

_MM: Why not?_

LM: Isn't it obvious?

_MM: Just give me straight answers!_

LM: Because something bad will happen!

_MM: You don't know that for sure._

LM: Yes, but I have a pretty good idea.

_MM: That doesn't make it true._

LM: I don't care! If you die, then so will I.

_MM: Who said anything about dying?_

LM: If Dustfinger gets angry, then it might come to that.

_MM: Why are you being so pessimistic? How do you know that Dustfinger won't just laugh it off?_

LM: I'm _not _being pessimistic; I'm trying to knock some sense into your head.

_MM: I have enough sense at the moment, thank you._

LM: By the way you're acting, you don't have _any _sense.

_MM: Of course I do!_

LM: Then why are you talking to yourself, huh?

_MM: That's besides the point! And you're talking to yourself, too. Stop getting sidetracked._

LM: Don't tell me what to do!

_MM: I will._

LM: But-

_MM: Seriously, though, it'll be fun to do that to Dustfinger._

LM: Don't interrupt me! And that fun will be short-lived.

_MM: You think so?_

LM: Of course! Don't do it!

_MM: But I'll have so much fun!_

LM: Yeah, until Dustfinger burns you.

_MM: I know some fire tricks, too! I can defend myself._

LM: You have, like, one-tenth of Dustfinger's skill with fire. It won't take too long for him to overpower you.

_MM: So even if he _does_ overpower me, it's not like he'll _kill_ me or something._

LM: You can't be sure about that.

_MM: Look, if Dustfinger wouldn't be able to kill _really _bad people like Orpheus and Basta, why would he kill me?_

LM: You've got a point, but still, I don't think it's a good idea.

_MM: You think I _care _what you think?_

LM: We're both the same person, so you _obviously_ do care what I think.

_MM: Sure, but I'm still gonna do it._

LM: Why do you choose bad things? Why?

_MM: Really, nothing bad will happen._

LM: Tell me that when Dustfinger gets really angry.

_MM: Believe me, it'll just be a joke!_

LM: Please, just don't do it.

_MM: I can't back out of it _now! _I've promised my readers that I'd do it._

LM: I'm sure your readers would rather have you alive, then have an epic story.

_MM: Just trust me, you're overreacting._

LM: Don't say I didn't warn you . . .

_MM: I won't._

LM: I guess you've made up your mind, right?

_MM: Yes._

LM: And nothing I say will make you change it?

_MM: Definitely._

LM: I guess I should start writing my will, then.

_MM: How many times do I have to tell you? It won't come to that!_

LM: It's better to be safe than sorry. Something I wish you would do, too.

_MM: Well, anything that doesn't kill you makes you stronger._

LM: You don't know that he won't kill you.

_MM: Yes, I am 99.9% sure that he won't. Besides, "no pain, no gain"._

LM: I'm supposed to be the logical one, here.

_MM: Well, you're not acting very logical at the moment._

LM: Yes, I am!

_MM: Could've fooled me._

LM: Why are we arguing with each other, anyways?

_MM: Because the Real Me wrote it like that._

LM: I don't want to argue anymore. This isn't going anywhere.

_MM: Tell that to Real Me, then. _(Real Me walks in) _Well speak of the devil. There she is._

**RM: Hi, Logical Me and Mischevious Me.**

LM: Why are you making us argue with eachother?

**RM: Because, I need to show the mental torment going on in my head regarding my plan.**

_MM: So, since your to lazy to do it yourself, you want us to do the tedious work of arguing with each other._

**RM: Exactly. Wait, who're you calling lazy?**

_MM: You._

LM: You _do _realize that in saying that, you are also calling yourself and myself lazy?

**RM: My point exactly.**

LM: Can we please not carry out this plan? I, for one, _am_ interested in self-preservation.

_MM: For God's sake, you are _seriously_ overreacting. Nothing will happen, nothing!_

LM: Yes it will!

_MM: No it won't!_

LM: Yes it will!

_MM: No it won't!_

LM: Yes!

_MM: No!_

LM: Yes!

_MM: No!_

**RM: TACITE! TU ESTIS PESTIS!**

LM and MM: What?

**RM: Sorry, I went into Latin mode. If you want to know, I said 'QUIET! YOU GUYS ARE PESTS!'**

LM: Okay. Are we all in agreement that carrying out "the pln" isn't a good idea?

MM and RM: Of course it's a good idea!

LM: Let's vote. All in favor of "the paln" say 'Aye'.

_MM: Aye!_

**RM: Aye!**

LM: I guess this means I'm destined to be doomed.

_MM: Yes! This is going to be so awesome!_

**RM: The next chapter will be the plan carried out, and it will be EPIC, so keep reading, my faithful readers! R&R!**

_MM: Doesn't that mean Railroad?_

LM: No, dummy. It means Read and Review.

_MM; I'm not dumb!_

LM: Are too!

_MM: Are not!_

LM: Are too!

_MM: Are not!_

**RM: Why, oh why, do I have such annoying aspects in my personality? XDDD**


	7. The Plan: Part One

**Well, here's the first part of "The Plan". Enjoy!**

…..

Dawn sparkled through the forest. All was still, even the figure of a man with sandy hair, sitting with his back against a tree. It seemed as if nature itself was holding its breath for the plan that would be carried out today . . . Wow, I'm being _way_ too poetic.

Yep, today's the day, the sun is shining, and I am (possibly) going to get harmed in some way. What fun!

I BEGIN VIDEOTAPING-

Me: Today, we will be observing an interesting species. It is amazing to see this creature performing it's breathtaking tricks. Today, and this is one time only, we will be observing _Homo ignis-__**vescoras*, **_**also known as fire-eaters. This particular one is more commonly known as . . . Dustfinger, and some even call him Dusty.**

**Someone (whispers): Psst, Radha!**

**Me: Cue the theme song! (turns to the person) What is it, Signor Foltchart?**

**BEHIND THE SCENES-**

**Mo: What on earth are you doing?**

**Me: I'm videotaping Dustfinger.**

**Mo: Why?**

**Me: It's fun!**

**Mo: But you don't have time for this!**

**Me: Oh really? Why not?**

**Mo: You have so much to do.**

**Me: I can mange my time myself, thank you.**

**Mo: But there are so many people who want you to continue your story, and you're just wasting time!**

**Me: I'm **_**not**_** wasting time. This is part of the story. Now can you **_**please **_**let me get on with the show?**

**Mo: Fine, fine. I'll leave. But I hope you're telling the truth.**

**Me: Signor Foltchart, I wouldn't lie to anyone unless it was necessary. Least of all the Bluejay!**

**Mo: Ok, then, but don't call me that. 'Bye!**

**Me: Yeah, the theme song's almost over. Let's get back to the show!**

***this is roughly fire-eater in Latin. If you have a better translation, tell me.**

…**..**

This is not the whole thing, just so everyone knows. It would just be way too tedious to read through if I posted all of it at once. Besides, that gives you readers an incentive to come back. I won't add the second part until I get at least two reviews, so R&R, please! I know I'm evil!


	8. The Plan: Part Two

**Here's the second part, all my loyal readers! Enjoy!**

…..

Dawn sparkled through the forest. All was still, even the figure of a man with sandy hair, sitting with his back against a tree. It seemed as if nature itself was holding its breath for the plan that would be carried out today . . . Wow, I'm being _way_ too poetic.

Yep, today's the day, the sun is shining, and I am (possibly) going to get harmed in some way. What fun!

I BEGIN TAPING-

Me: As I was saying, we will be observing this awesome species, Dustfinger, today. Let us see how this organism responds to a stimulus.

So saying, I creep up to right behind the tree where Dustfinger is sitting. Then, bending low to right near his ear, I shout, "HI DUSTFINGER!"

Dustfinger jumps up and turns around to face me, and as he's doing that, a bucket of ice-cold water falls on his head.

Yeah, I know, an ingenious plan, right?

Dusty (soaking wet, very shocked): What—what—good—God—what?

Me (between very hard laughter): As you can see . . . (laughs really hard) . . . he is extremely fast and agile. (Laughs even more) Omigod, this is HILARIOUS! Though he seems to have lost coherent speech at the moment . . . (still laughing a lot) . . . I assure you he can talk. He—

Dusty (initial shock is gone, replaced by rage): WHAT IN THE WORLD DID YOU DO THAT FOR?

Me (still laughing): Which world?

Dusty: This world! Any world! WHY DID YOU DO THAT?

Me (chortling): I . . . I thought you were taking a break for _entirely_ too long. Omigod, I'm sooo putting this on YouTube!

Dusty: NOT IF I CAN HELP IT! That was really not cool at all.

Me: Um . . . thanks, but you don't need to tell me it was hot.

Dusty: AND _WHEN _I SAY IT WAS HOT?

Me: See, cool is another word for cold. And if something isn't cold, it is hot. So—

Dusty: BY FIRE AND FARIES, YOU HAVE _GOT _TO BE THE MOST ANNOYING PERSON I'VE EVER MET!

Me: Do I take that as a compliment?

Dusty: NO! ABSOLUTLY NOT!

Me: Fine, fine. Calm down, Dustfinger. You want to play with fire? That always calms you down.

Dusty (through gritted teeth): The only person who's going to play with fire is _me_!

Me: Then what will I do?

Dusty (voice is ominously soft): You? You'll be the victim . . .

Me (slightly perturbed): W—what do you mean?

Dusty: I mean _exactly _what I said.

…..

**O.O What on earth could Dustfinger mean? I'm really scared now! You'll find out only if **I get at least two reviews, so R&R, please! I know I'm evil!


	9. The Plan: Part Three

**Last part of "The Plan", everyone! Enjoy!**

…**..**

_Dusty: I mean _exactly _what I said._

I BEGIN TAPING-

Me: Y-you mean you're gonna burn me?

Dusty: Yes! That'll teach you to mess with me. (takes a step towards me)

Me (involuntarily steps back): R-really? I-I don't think that'll b-be necessary.

Dusty: Yeah, _now_ you don't think it'll be necessary.

Me (scared): Come on, Dustfinger, It w-was just a joke! We don't need to take this _too_ far, do we?

Dusty: Should've thought of that earlier, eh?

Me: Dustfinger, I'm serious!

Dusty: And so am I. Someone needs to teach you a lesson you'll never forget!

Me: Yeah, but I'm sure we can talk this out, right?

Dusty: It's too late for that, now.

Me: (Ducks out of the room and starts running away)

Dusty: (Sets a tiny bit of fire to my behind)

Me: Hello, good viewers, this is why you should never make a fire-eater angry. They have a temper like the fire they play with! Ahh! My butt's on fire!

Dusty: (runs after me)

Me: NO! HELP! SOMEBODY! ANYBODY!

Dusty( catches up to me and takes me down in a flying tackle): Shut up!

Me: HELP! SOMEBODY HELP!

Dusty: Be quiet, or so help me, I'll do . . . something bad.

Me: MURDER! MURDER!

Dusty: Radha, stop it! What's the word you use sometimes? Tacky-something?

Me (can't help smiling): Its _tacite, _Dustfinger. Latin for be quiet. Argh, let _go_ of me!

TAPE IS PAUSED-

Okay, let's reflect on this for a minute. Here I am, being chased by a mad pyrokinetic—

Dusty: I'm not mad!

Yes you are. Anyways, here I am, and I can't help smiling because someone mispronounces a latin word. No wonder people say I'm crazy!

Okay, back to the tape now!

TAPE STARTS PLAYING—

Dusty: Okay, but stop yelling and running.

Me: Fine! Just let go! (Dusty lets go) I'll be going home now.

Dusty: No, you're not going _anywhere!_

Me (sighs): I-it was worth a try. S-so, what're y-you going to do?

Dusty: Can you stop _stuttering_? It's getting on my nerves.

Me: When someone is scared, it's hard _not_ to stutter.

Dusty: You're _actually _scared?

Me: No, duh!

Dusty: _Seriously?_

Me: Yes, Dustfinger, yes!

Dusty: 'Cause you're not acting like it.

Me (fear and anger are churning inside): I. Don't. Care. If you're going to do something, do it! If not, then let me leave! Just get it over with, before I freaking' explode!

Dusty: (starts laughing)

Me: What the heck?

Dusty: (still laughing)

Me: Why the heck are you laughing? Whats so funny?

Dusty: I . . . I got you, didn't I?

Me: What?

Dusty: That was a joke!

Me (sarcastic and mockingly): Ha. Ha. Ha. Oh my god. That was so _incredibly funny_ that I _completely _forgot to laugh. Wonderful birthday gift.

Dusty( mock surprise): It's your _birthday?_

Me: Yeah, I've _only_ been telling you every day for the last few weeks. How _dense_ do you think I am? You know Dustfinger, I'm leaving now.

Dusty: But—

Me: No! I'm going.

Dusty (bars my way): Radha, don't leave.

Me( pushes past him): I'm leaving, OK.

Dusty: But—

I have already gone too far to hear what he's saying, or perhaps I just choose not to listen.

….

**R&R, everyone! Hope you enjoyed! There's probably going to be one more chapter about how Dustfinger and I make it up.**


	10. Reconcilation

**A/N: Okay, guys, this chapter is in third person omniscient. This is partly because it was easier to write this way and because I want people to know that I can actually **_**write. **_** It's set on the same day (well, all of this is on the same day!) but a few hours later. Enjoy!**

**I dedicate this chapter to Sauron Gorthaur because:**

**a) Of reviewing all my chapters so comprehensively. I really appreciate it!**

**b) In this chapter, Dustfinger is way more in-character than in any of the others. I used your tips, so thanks!**

**c) She joined CFF and is a wonderful, nice person on there.**

**So, without further ado:**

Dustfinger stood, watching the girl slowly make her way home. He would have normally tried to stop her, but he had seen in her eyes that she really was adamant about it. So now, here he was, standing and staring. He realized that he probably _had_ taken it too far. But his temper, like the fire he controlled, flared up very suddenly and then died down minutes later. He knew that she knew that. So it must have been more than just his anger that caused her to go home. He tried to see it the way she had. _Okay, so there's this grown man, who is also your master, and he happens to be the best fire-eater in the world, with extra-special powers since he came back from Death, twice _ (He really _was_ trying to be modest!). _ And now he's threatening you with fire, chasing you, and setting you on fire. And after he has you scared to death. he starts laughing at you, as if it's all just a big joke. _Ah. That was it.

Radha had not gone home. She was sitting at the edge of a pond. This was the place where she came every time something good or bad happened to her. It always made her calm down and feel a connection with nature. Tall, leafy trees surrounded it, and Radha sat against one, with her knees to her chest, gazing at the lake, and trying to get her anger out of her system.

_Why did Dustfinger _do_ that? _She thought ._What did he want to get?_ But hard as she tried, she couldn't seem to find the answers. Well, Dustfinger wasn't any easy character to read, anyways. After what seemed like hours, Radha finally decided that she wasn't getting anywhere, really. All that she was feeling was guilt and anger. Guilt for her actions, and anger at Dustfinger's. _The problem with me, though, _she thought,_ is that I have a guilty conscience the size of the planet! Perhaps I should go back and—_Radha froze, as she sensed someone standing behind her.

Dustfinger decided that it would be better if _he_ made the first move in this case, because though the girl _could_ be quite annoying (And no one could deny it!) what he had done had probably felt much worse to her than what she had done to him. He knew that the girl—_Why didn't he call her Radha?—_probably hadn't gone home. At least, he hope she hadn't, because he didn't really want to go as an unwelcome visitor to someone's house right now. He thought she most probably had gone to that pond, the one that she had excitedly shown him one day. As he walked along, he thought about what he would actually say to her. He thought it would be nice to show her a new trick, once—and _if—_she had calmed down. The Fire-Dancer silently stole up, behind her, and watched her for a few minutes. Then he saw her stiffen up, and then burst out giggling. Dustfinger wondered what had happened

_It's probably Master Dusty, _Radha thought, but that didn't stop her heart from racing. _Wait. Master Dusty? Omigod, that's really funny. What about Master of Dusty? No, even better, Master of Dustyness! _She burst out giggling, because that was just too much for her to keep inside. And when she spoke, there was a laugh in her voice. "How long do you plan to stand there, Master-of-Dustyness?" Too late, she realized she had said the new nickname out loud.

Dustfinger jumped backwards, startled by the sudden address, but he quickly regained his composure. _Well, at least she seems to be happy. Maybe we won't have to go through the whole apologizing thing. _Dustfinger didn't exactly enjoy all that drama and what-not. He thought it might help if he just played along, so he raised an eyebrow and spoke, "Master of dustiness? Now that's a name I haven't heard before!"

But Radha had now remembered that she was actually angry at him. "What are you _doing_ here? Isn't what you did already _enough?"_

"Radha, it was _just _a _joke!" _Oh, God, he really wasn't destined for good luck, was he?

Radha stood up and faced him. "I must say, you certainly have a weird sense of humor, then."

"You don't have to be so upset about it, you know."

_This was too much! Why was he acting like this? _ "Oh, I don't, do I? What's so funny about threatening your apprentice? I think I must have missed it, _Master!_ Perhaps you would be kind enough to teach me about it!"

Dustfinger was starting to get a tiny bit irritated, but he suppressed it, because he knew that it wouldn't help anything. "Now, there's no reason to get that tone. And it's not my fault if you can't take a joke. Remember that _you_ started this, not me."

"_Sir,_ I think you need to rethink your definition of 'a joke'! If I snuck up behind my brother and poured water on his head, and a policeman saw me, nothing would happen! If, however, I chased my brother with a lighted torch saying things like 'you'll be the victim!', I'd be off to juvie right away! That, _mister,_ is the definition of 'a joke'!"

"Since when do you call me things like 'sir' and 'mister'? And what in fire's name is _juvie?"_

"Since you started acting like some jerk instead of a good person!" She retorted," Juvie is short for Juvenile Detention center; jail for anyone under 18. And is_ that _the only thing you got out of this?"

"Possibly." He let the part about being a jerk slide, because he _had _come here to apologize, not to create a scene. But Heaven knew that the girl's attitude wasn't helping!

"Possibly? _Possibly?_ You know, I fail to understand why you came here in the first place. Can't you just freakin' leave me alone? For once?"

Now this was going a bit far. Though Dustfinger wasn't showing any emotion on the outside, his anger was churning on the inside, and that came out when he spoke. "Look who's talking now! I have to deal with this _every single day! _ You deserve every bit of this, and you know it! So stop—" Dustfinger was startled as he saw silent tears sliding down Radha's face.

Radha, however, noticed him watching, and she angrily wiped them away. _Great! Now he knows I've been crying, too. Way to make a good offense, don't you think? This is just wonderful!_

Dustfinger, meanwhile, was starting to feel a bit awkward. He just walked all the way down to the pond, and as he stood there, the fire rose forth, unbidden, and reflected his mood. Radha stared, entranced by the dancing flames, and they seemed to burn away the anger she had been feeling for the last few hours. "It's so . . . beautiful!" she finally said.

Dustfinger looked up, and realized what the flames had been doing. They slunk back into the ground, and Radha walked down to him. Everything was so peaceful, and Radha stood there breathing in the fragrance of the honeysuckles growing around the bank. "This really _is _a beautiful place that you showed me, Radha." Dustfinger said, softly.

"Listen,Dustfinger, I'm really—"

"Don't say it. I'm the one who should be sorry, not you."

"But you were right! You _do_ have to deal with my annoying-ness everyday, and I definitely _did _deserve it. Just, next time you feel angry, don't be so . . . so—"

"Annoying? Frightening? Just to name a few." Dustfinger said, a small smile stealing over his lips.

"I . . . I guess" she said, awkwardly, but then she noticed his smile. "Hey! Now you're making fun of me!"

"Who, me? Why would I ever do such a thing?" he said, with mock surprise.

"Oh, be quiet!"

"As you wish, princess." he said, bowing so low, it was mocking. "Well, if you wish to give me the pleasure of your company for a while longer, I _could_ show you another trick. That is, if you want to."

"Of course! Let's start now!"

And Dustfinger smiled again as he saw the eagerness in her eyes.

They walked out of the forest, talking happily. And they never got on each other's nerves again.

**Dusty (reading over my shoulder): That's not true!**

**Me: What's not true?**

**Dusty: 'And they never got on each other's nerves again.'**

**Me: But it makes the story sound better.**

**Dusty: Oh, it's all about the **_**story**_** now.**

**Me: Okay, okay, I **_**get **_**it. How about 'and their annoying acts against each other were drastically reduced.'**

**Dusty: Leave the part about 'drastically' out.**

**Me: Fine! Be that way!**

**Dusty: Read and review, all of you people who actually **_**like**_ **to read these stories.**

**Me: Hey! Don't mess with my faithful readers.**

**Dusty: You know there's no point in telling me that 'cause I'm still going to do it.**

**Me: (sigh) Yes, yes, I do.**

**Dusty and I: And thus ends the saga of "The Plan". Hope you enjoyed it! :D**


	11. Thoughts after The Plan

**A/N: I'm really, really sorry that it took me a while to update. It's just that I was working on other stories. But now, our beloved Logical me and Mischevious me are back! Hope you enjoy!**

_MM (singing): I am the champion! I am the champion! (_isn't Queen awesome?)

LM (sulking in a corner, muttering to herself): Well, guess Mrs. Gloater-Pants is having a gloating good time gloating like a big gloater in her Gloater Kingdom as Princess Gloats-a-lot!

_MM: Hey, don't be such a bad sport!_

LM: I'm _not_ a bad sport! Besides, how do you know what I'm saying?

_MM: 'Cause we're the same person, duh! And you are too acting bad sport-ish._

LM: Look, I just don't want to talk to you, 'kay? Just leave me alone!

_MM: Fine! Have it your way!_

LM: Fine! See if I care! (MM leaves the corner)

_MM (singing again): I am the win-ner, la la la-la la. She is the lo-ser, la la la-la la. I wa-as ri-ight, la la la-la la. She wa-as wro-ong, la la la-la la. (continues singing this tune)_

LM (after a while of her singing): Would you _stop_ that?

_MM: Stop what?_

LM: Don't even TRY to pretend, MM! Just stop.

_MM(Innocently): What? I ask you. Stop what?_

LM: Stop being Princess Gloats-a-lot, okay? Is that easy enough to go through your thick skull?

_MM(cheekily): You don't have to say that in such an insulting manner, you know._

LM: Mischievous, I've just about had it with you!

_MM: C'mon, don't you get it? This is, like . . . like the first time in forever that I've actually been right!_

LM: And that has to do with this because?

_MM: Well, can't you imagine how happy I am now?_

LM: What—exactly—were you right about, again?

_MM: A certain important event recently dubbed 'The Plan'_

LM: Oh, _that_.

_MM (mimicking): Yes, THAT!_

LM: Well, technically, you weren't _really_ right because you said the whole thing would just be a joke and it wasn't because everything was messed up for a while so—

MM: _Well, _ACTUALLY_ I was right because it did end up being fine since no one actually got hurt or killed like _YOU_, Ms. Pessimist, was saying!_

LM: Oh yeah? What about the bruises I—we, I guess—got from Dustfinger's flying tackle, huh?

_MM: That? That was nothing! It wasn't even that bad!_

LM: _Sure _it wasn't. You're the one who was whining about it all night.

_MM: I was not!_

LM: _SURE_ you weren't!

_MM: I wasn't! You're the one who was doing that!_

LM: Who, me? I don't do that type of thing. It's not in my personality.

_MM(smirks): Oh, really? And *I* was the one whining about your victory, right?_

LM: Ugh, just . . . just shut up, okay!

_MM: You didn't say the magic wo-ord._

LM: Oh, puh-lease. Stop acting like a two year old!

_MM: Ha! You said it! Even though you didn't want to, you said it!_

**RM: Girls, girls, what's going on here?**

LM and MM (at the same time): She's acting like Princess Gloats-a-lot!_ She's acting like Ms. Bad Sporty Pessimist!_

**RM: hercale! vos semper pulsatior quam duo leones! Cur vos ille facitis? Cur?**

LM: Could you PLEASE spare us the Latin? You know, speaking in regular English?

_MM: Yeah, I mean it's not like it helps anything._

**RM: Oh my god did you guys just agree about something?**

LM and MM: (give her a death glare) We want a translation, okay?

**RM: But what if I don't want to translate?**

LM: Then . . . then we'll just have to make you.

**RM: What is that supposed to mean?**

_MM: It's not that difficult, Real. It means I get to torture the answer out of you! Mwahahahaha!_

**RM: What? That doesn't even make sense! You'd be torturing yourself!**

_MM: You think I CARE if I'm tortured? I'm a lunatic! Mwahahahahaha! *goes into maniacal laughter*_

**RM (starting to get scared): Okay, okay, fine I'll tell you what I said!**

_MM: Aw, but I wanted to torture you! It was getting really fun._

**RM (mutters): You just wait and see. Then you'll see what's**_** fun**_**. . . (out loud) Okay, I said "By Hercules! You argue more than a pair of lions! Why do you do this? Why?" Happy now?**

LM: All I'm saying is that you'd better be telling the truth or else . . .

**RM: Just one question. Since when did you guys become, like, evil?**

LM: Good and evil are relative. It depends on what side you're on.

**RM: Oh-ho! Now we've become all wise, haven't we? What happened to your argument with MM, then?**

LM (casually): Oh, we just argue all the time. It's in our nature.

**RM (gritted teeth): Well, you see, the problem is that whenever your **_**nature**_** acts up, it becomes a pain in the neck for me!**

_MM: Well, suck it up. Deal with it. 'Life isn't fair, get used to it.'_

**RM: Thank you, dear one, for that enlightening message, especially quoting Bill Gates.**

_MM: Why, you're very welcome!_

**RM (irritated beyond words): Well, I guess I should be going. (leaves abruptly)**

LM: Bye!

**RM: (doesn't answer)**

_MM: What's up with HER?_

LM (hidden sarcasm): I have no idea whatsoever. Do you?

**So then, how'd you like it? After this, I'm going back to answering questions, okay? So now we can say that everything regarding 'The Plan' is over! I hope you guys liked it! :D**


	12. Does Dusty actually LIKE mentoring me?

Me: *walks in* Hi, Dustfinger!

Dusty: Hi—oh _joy_, I get to be stuck with you for 2 ½ months. So much fun.

Me: What do you mean?

Dusty: Your school's out, right?

Me: *nods*

Dusty: And your summer break is that long?

Me: Yeah, but—

Dusty: So that's what I mean!

Me: But you don't get it. I'm not spending _all_ summer with _you._ *thinks for a moment* Wow, that came out really wrong. I just mean that I'm going to go on vacation, and spend time with my family, and stuff like that. In fact, that's why I came here.

Dusty: Why _did_ you come here?

Me: To say good-bye.

Dusty (startled): Good- _bye_? Whatever do you mean by that?

Me (mischeviously) : What, you're not gonna _miss_ me, are you?

Dusty: Miss you? *laughs* Of course not! I'll get some peace and quiet for _once_! Just . . . do you mean that you're leaving for . . . forever?

Me: Definitely . . .

Dusty: *stricken look*

Me: *savors the moment* . . . not!

Dusty: *sigh* _That's_ a relief!

Me (triumphantly) : So you _are_ going to miss me!

Dusty: No, I'm not. *changes the subject* So where . . . exactly . . . are you going?

Me: To six different countries in Europe! Isn't that _awesome_?

Dusty (half-heartedly): Yeah . . . have fun . . . without me.

Me *gets the hint*: It's only about 20 days, you know. After that, you'll have your LIVELY apprentice back!

Dusty *groans*: And what fun'll that be, right?

Me (enthusiastically): You said it! I can't _wait_ to get back . . . and I haven't even _left_ yet! But I'm very excited about _that, _too, 'cause all I've seen of Europe before now is some of the airports. And believe me, that's _nothing_!

Dusty (superior look): So that means I've seen more of you're world than _you_ have!

Me: Oh, but that'll change. That'll change real soon. Besides, you haven't been to more than half the states in the U.S. Or to Canada. Or India. Or Qatar. Or—

Dusty: I _get _it! I _get _it!

Me: And you know what the best part is? I'm going _alone_! I mean, it'll be with 40 other kids and 4 teachers, but no family at all! *sniffle* I'm gonna miss my mommy! And my daddy! *starts crying on the floor*

Dusty (panicking): It's fine! Think of all the fun you'll have! That's an amazing experience!

Me: (still crying) But what does it matter if—if you don't miss me?

Dusty: Is _that_ what this is about?

Me: (crying) No, it's about missing my family. But you're pretty close to being like my family! And I'll miss these conversations, making fun of you, and learning how to tame fire. But most of all . . . I'll miss—YOU!

Dusty (somewhat touched): Well, I guess—heaven help me—I _will_ miss you, and these questions, even though Lord knows they can be _such_ a _pain_!

Me: Aha! So there we have it! Good ol' Dusty _is_ a soft-heart after all!

Dusty (mock anger): So you did all this for _that_? I'll get you for this! *starts chasing me around*

Me: bye, all! I'll miss you guys, but I'll have fun! And Dustfinger's not gonna kill me, or hurt me in any way, okay? *leaves room*

Dusty (to all of you): That's what _she_ thinks!


	13. Radha does something stupid!

**A/N: Hey everyone, guess what? I'm still alive! And I'm updating! *ducks at thrown rotten vegetables* Yes, yes I know it's been a while since I last updated—many months, actually, but I'm updating now, right? I've just been very busy w/ school and all, especially since we're having our quarterly exams right now. But I wanted to put this up so that you lot don't think I've given up. **

**So then . . .**

Me: Hello everyone, and welcome to the Conversations with Dustfinger! This is Radha, reporting to you live from the Planet Earth! *crowd cheers* It is the story that I've been working on for the longest, and still writing. (mutters) Though those updates have been long in coming . . . *crowd cheers again* And now, the moment you've all been waiting for—drumroll, please—we are welcoming Dustfinger to the stage!

*Dustfinger walks in, a bit awkwardly*

Me: Let's give it up for Dustfinger! *crowd goes wild* So, Dustfinger, do you have anything to say on this joyous occasion?

Dustfinger *icily*: Yes, I would very much like to know the reason for your unprovoked attack on me.

*crowd gasps*

Me *feigning innocence*: What is this that you are speaking of?

Dustfinger *raises eyebrow*: Oh, you know all too well what I am talking about.

Me: I do?

Dustfinger: You do. And if you really don't, which I find extremely hard to believe, then you would do well to remember it.

Me *resigns to the fact, and whispers to Dustfinger*: You know, I don't think this is really a good time to talk about that, but we can definitely resolve it . . . later.

Dustfinger *loudly*: Oh, I don't believe that's necessary. It should be easy enough to resolve right now, shouldn't it?

Me *whispers urgently*: _Dustfinger! _Please be quiet!

Dustfinger *still loud*: So now we're all polite, aren't we? I don't recall you being so well-mannered when you _slapped_ me.

*crowd gasps again, followed by shouts of "Boo!" directed at yours truly*

Me: Listen, I can explain! Please, just listen!

Dustfinger *crosses arms*: Well, this better be good.

Me *glances at him*: Um . . . well, it was really just a spur-of-the-moment thing. I didn't really think about it—

Dustfinger: And what else is new?

Me *glares at him, then continues*: -so I'm _really_ very sorry, but I have no other explanation.

Dustfinger: And that's a _very_ good explanation, isn't it?

Me: I know it ISN'T but it's the only one I have, and you don't have to be so mean. After all, I _am_ trying to apologize to you.

Dustfinger: Thus far, I don't get the feeling that you're actually sorry.

Me: So what are you going to do about it, _sir_?

Dustfinger: Now, see, this is what I don't like. The tone. It's not very apologetic. *to the crowd* Wouldn't you agree?

Crowd *hastens to agree* : YES!

Me *sarcastic*: Well, this is rather nice, isn't it. _I'm_ the one putting on this show in the first place, and the lot of you are just yelling at me. It makes me feel so _very_ appreciated.

Dustfinger: How nice of you to feel that way!

Me: Okay, so it's becoming clear to me that I have greatly upset you by my . . . er . . . unprovoked actions—

Dustfinger: So you _do_ have a brain! I never would've guessed!

Me *ignores his comment* : -_but_ my question is: What on earth do you want me to do about it?

Dustfinger *enigmatic*: Wait and see, just wait and see . . .

Me: Well, you heard him! Stay tuned to find out what happens . . . on a later date!

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**Yeah, I know that was short, so I'm sorry, but at least my conscience feels a little better now that I can say that I've written **_**something**_** since July. I hope you enjoyed it! **


	14. What is Dustfinger's last name?

**Thanks for still being a faithful reader, Sauron Gorthaur!**

**I don't own the song _"Party Rock"._**

****

Me *in my room, attempting the shuffle*: Dusty Finger's in the house tonight, everybody just have a good time . . .

Dusty *walks in without me noticing and stares, puzzled*

Me *still singing* : And he's gonna make you lose your mind, everybody just have a good—

Dusty *crosses arms and raises eyebrow*: What in the blazes are you doing, girl?

Me *stops abruptly and says sheepishly*: Dustfinger! I didn't expect you . . . er, how kind of you to drop by!

Dusty *rolls eyes*: Yes, and I can just your incredible _enthusiasm_. What was that . . . _ridiculous_ thing you were doing?

Me *acts offended*: I'll have you know that it was a popular dance move to a popular song!

Dusty *rolls eyes again*: What _do_ they teach you in this world?

Me *waves him off*: Well, now that you're here, I may as well ask you a question. It's been a while.

Dusty *sighs resignedly*: So true . . . but why do such good things have to pass too quickly?

Me: Such is this wonderful thing called life . . .but do you mind if I ask you one?

Dusty: Well . . . you're still going to ask me whether or not I mind, right?

Me: I suppose . . .

Dusty: So what's this question of yours?

Me: Well, I was wondering what your last name was.

Dusty: My last name?

Me *as if talking to a little kid*: Yes. Your last name. Also known as a surname. The thing that comes after your first name and your middle name.

Dusty *annoyed*: There comes that tone again . . . but why would you want to know, anyways?

Me: Because I thought it would be more respectful.

Dusty: What in the world are you talking about?

Me: I mean it's much better to call someone older than you by a prefix such as Mr. and then follow it by their last name, rather then just using their first name.

Dusty *raises eyebrow somewhat suspiciously*: And what, pray tell, did I do that suddenly deserves so much . . . respect?

Me *innocently, managing to keep a straight face*: Everything you do warrants that, dear master!

Dusty *still has the same tone and eyebrow raised*: So why, may I ask, do you suddenly have this _brilliant_ idea that I deserve more respect?

Me *slightly frustrated*: Look, I'm just trying to be good, okay?

Dusty: Why?

Me: Because of the . . . ah, _unpleasant incidents_ of the past few days.

Dusty: Is that _really_ your explanation?

Me: Why do you keep patronizing me about my explanations? Yes! It appears to be so!

Dusty: Why are you acting so strange today?

Me: I'm _not_ acting strange! I'm just trying to be a nice apprentice!

Dusty: Why?

Me *has reached a breaking point*: Heavens above! WOULD YOU STOP ANSWERING EVERYTHING I SAY WITH A QUESTION?

Dusty *smiles*: Why?

Me: *gives him a death glare*

Dusty *still smiling* : Oh, okay, fine. But has it occurred to you that this may be the way I'm punishing you for the—how did you put it?—unpleasant incidents of the past few days?

Me *grumbles*: If it is, then I'm going to just about die of annoyance.

Dusty *smugly*: Then I'd say it'll be a worthwhile venture. But now for your question. I don't think I have one, or else I don't remember it.

Me *angrily*: So you're telling me that I went through all of that for _nothing_?

Dusty: It would seem so.

Me *still irritated* : I want to ask you something else. Why are _you_ acting so weird today?

Dusty: Who, me? Weird? *thinks for a moment, then says jokingly* Well, I guess a fire-eater who's come back from Death and apparently has fire in his veins _is_ kind of weird.

Me *annoyed*: You know what, just . . . just hang it all, okay?

Dusty: Well, I really _don't_ know what my last name is—or rather, was. I was too little to understand when . . . *breaks off, not knowing how to explain* Just call me Mr. Dustfinger, if you must.

Me: That's too long. How about Mr. Dusty?

Dusty: Oh no, we're not going there again . . .

Me: What do you mean?

Dusty *sarcastically*: I mean the completely respectful term of 'Master of Dustyness'. That business.

Me *sheepishly*: Oh . . . that.

Dusty *mocks my tone*: Yes, that. Very annoying indeed.

Me: But there must be _something_. Like Dusty Sir, or Sir Dusty, or Master Dusty.

Dusty: Not really, no, and DEFINITELY NOT. What's wrong with 'Dustfinger' anyways?

Me: Oh, there's nothing wrong with it! It's quite a . . . unique name.

Dusty *ignores my tone*: Then let's just leave it as it is, shall we?

Me: Okay then. Does this mean that you've decided not to do anything?

Dusty: What are you referring to?

Me: For lack of a better term, the "unpleasant incidents" of the past few days.

Dusty: When did I say that? Don't think you're off the hook just because I answered one of your foolish questions!

Me *mutters*: I should've known . . .

**I hope you liked it! It's been a while I've been working in this fandom, so I'm attempting to make a comeback. As always, R&R!**


	15. Convincing LM

LM: No, Mischevious! Don't do it! Why must you always get us in trouble?

_MM *innocently*: I have no idea what you're talking about._

LM *sarcastically*: Ha. Nice try. How stupid do you think I am? I-

_MM: Um…I don't know how to answer that question without making you angry…_

LM: You're not SUPPOSED to answer it. That was a rhetorical question. Of course, you'd have to have some _brains _in that head of yours to understand that.

_MM *cheekily*: Temper, temper. Need I remind you yet again that any insults to me are equivalent to insulting yourself?_

LM *seething*: No, you need not. I am perfectly aware of the fact myself. However, would you be kind enough to fulfill my original request?

_MM *whining*: But LM! It would be so funny! Can't you imagine it? _

LM: Trust me, I can imagine it fully and truly. It would be _funny_, just like dumping a bucket of ice-cold water on him and slapping him "accidentally" was funny. No, I've had enough of this, now! I am not going to take this any longer! You better shape up before he really does decide to kill you!

_MM: Geez, calm down, LM. It's not the end of the world._

LM: No, I'm done with your carefree, "_oh, nothing's going to happen" _attitude! Listening to you always gets me in trouble. Besides, I like Dustfinger. I don't know why you have to keep bothering him.

_MM: LM, he's my-our _mentor!_ We _have_ to bother him. That's the _point.

LM: Not the way I see it. You're supposed to respect your elders, not make their lives even more miserable.

_MM: I don't think Dustfinger would appreciate you calling him old._

LM: I never said he was _old._ But he's older than us! Therefore, we should just lie low and act like a good apprentice would for once instead of constantly getting on his nerves.

_MM: But that's what we did last time, remember? And Dustfinger ended up acting like a jerk. So we have a perfectly good reason to get back at him._

LM: No, no, that's where you're wrong! He did that because RM slapped him. Then this'll just become a viscious cycle. Two wrongs never make a right!

_MM: Have you ever heard the saying "An eye for an eye?"_

LM: I have, but have _you _ever heard Gandhi's counter to that? "An eye for an eye only makes the whole world blind."

_MM: Gosh, LM, you're never any fun. Why do you have to be such a goody-two-shoes all the time?_

LM: Because _someone_ has to keep us all from getting killed. And you know as well as I do that that's not true. I am plenty of fun!

_MM: Yeah, sure, whatever you say, Queen of Boring._

LM: Don't call me that!

_MM: Well then, prove that you aren't. Just do this one last thing with me, and then I swear I'll never say anything about annoying Dustfinger again._

LM: Well…

_MM: Come on, LM! It's the chance of a lifetime. You don't want the readers to think you're some stuck-up person who never wants to do anything fun, do you?_

LM: It is my policy not to let other people's opinions dictate my actions.

_MM: Whatever. The point is, come on! Let's do this! It'll be fun!_

LM *mutters*: Until we die, that is. *out loud* Oh, very well, fine. As long as you promise that we'll never do anything mean or annoying to Dustfinger ever again.

_MM: Definitely. Agreed. Now come on!_

LM: Let's hope I don't live to regret this...*walks out*

_MM *to the audience, conspiratorially*: She should've checked to see whether or not I had my fingers crossed…_ *goes off into maniacal evil laughter*

**So, what did you think? I feel bad for LM. At least they haven't dragged **_**me**_** into this conversation, yet. You'll have to wait a while to see just what it is that MM is planning, though, because I'm going off on vacation for a while! Have a nice summer! Happy belated Fourth of July to fellow Americans!**


	16. Mr Refi

**A/N: *slams face on desk repeatedly* I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry (yes that was a DW reference). It's been so long. Way too long. I've missed writing so much. And I know I've made you all wait for so long. Please forgive me, if any of you still care about this story. I really didn't mean to stop writing for so long, but life just got ahead of me. I promise I'll try to be better about updating from now on. **

Dustfinger: *playing with fire* Thank goodness that girl hasn't come around to bother me in so long!

Me: *walks up, in a sweet tone* You were thinking about me, master?

Dustfinger: *stops abruptly and stares at me* By fire and faries, where in the world have you been for so long?

Me: *smiles* You mean you've actually missed me all those days?

Dustfinger: I never said that. But what happened?

Me: *smiles ruefully* Life. School's a killer. So is family. But I'm back now!

Dustfinger *sarcastically* I supposed you want me to act all happy now, right?

Me: *in a mock-sad way* Why, I thought there was more between us, Dustfinger. I thought you cared about me.

Dustfinger *rolls eyes*: Cut the drama. What are you planning to do to me this time?

Me *appears to be shocked*: Do to you? Whatever do you mean…_Mr. Refi_?

Dustfinger: Oh, don't act like you're unaware of what I'm referring to—what did you call me?

Me *simply, with an innocent smile*: Mr. Refi.

Dustfinger: Why?

Me: Because I've been thinking about it for the past year, and I finally decided that would be a good name for you. What do you think?

Dustfinger: I think that's ridiculous! You can't just _give_ someone a last name.

Me: Would you rather me call you Master of Dustyness?

Dustfinger: Absolutely not!

Me: Then I'd be happy with what I had, if I were you.

Dustfinger: Clearly, you've learned nothing about respect in the time you were gone.

Me: If you were any smarter, you'd realize I am_ trying_ to respect you by giving you a last name!

Dustfinger: But that's not how it works! In my world, last names don't matter!

Me: They do in mine.

Dustfinger: And what makes you think that I'm going to accommodate myself so things fit in with _your_ world?

Me: I think you're just being stubborn.

Dustfinger: Stubborn? Me? Why don't you look at yourself!

Me: I was just trying to be respectful.

Dustfinger: Will you drop that excuse already? We both know you're just trying to come up with a new way to torment me!

Me: That's not true!

Dustfinger: Of course it is! I've known you for a while now. You think I don't know how your mind works? That I don't realize this is just a new way to make me upset because somehow you think it is funny?

Me: I don't think it's funny! I was trying to be a good apprentice after leaving for so long!

Dustfinger: You can't fool me. I guess I'll just go back to playing with fire. I don't think you're ready to learn, yet.

Me *stares at him* Wait, what? You can't just make me leave! Not after I just came back!

Dustfinger *looks back evenly* I don't have to teach you anything if you aren't going to respect me, and realize that I can tell when you're lying.

Me: But I—that's not-*looks down* Fine. Maybe I was trying to have some fun. But I missed it, alright? I missed messing you after so long. I'm sorry I offended you.

*a long period of silence*

Dustfinger *sighs* Alright. It's fine.

Me *looks up eagerly*: Really?!

Dustfinger *half-smiles* I suppose so. But you're still not off the hook for the things you did a year ago, and in fact, you've added to them.

Me *hugs him*: I'll live. But thank you!

Dustfinger *rolls eyes, and pushes me away*: It's fine. But don't you _dare_ call me Mr. Refi again!

Me *laughs* I probably won't. But I'll make no promises!

Dustfinger: You had better not do it. You wouldn't, if you knew what was good for you. Of course, I sincerely doubt you have that much wisdom.

Me *rolls eyes*: That was just mean…

Dustfinger *smiles*: No one said you were the only one allowed to have fun. If it's the apprentice's job to mess with the master, the master's job is to do ten times that. You ought to know that by now.

Me: Sure…

Dustfinger: So then, ready for a new lesson? Hopefully, you haven't forgotten everything else already. I'm sure you studied diligently.

Me: I…yes! Of—of course I did!

Dustfinger: We'll have to see...on second thought, maybe we should start with a review.

Me *relieved* Yes, that'll probably be best.

*the two of us walk off, Dustfinger happy at having his apprentice back, and I happy about getting back my master*

***bugs bunny voice* That's all for now, folks! Read and review! And keep the questions coming!**


End file.
